Choosing Your Triggers

A good friend of mine once said to me “No matter what, if a business isn’t meeting your goals in three years, drop it and move on to something else – no matter what!”

Charlie Sheppard is one of the most consistently happy people I’ve ever known.  He has the lovely family, loyal friends, beautiful home, the income and independence that almost anyone would envy.

Charlie, an old time NLP’er and I had recently met.  I had started my first NLP Institute about a year and half before.  We discovered we both had started businesses at various times in our lives.  So we found ourselves talking about the ins and outs of starting and running a business.  We both agreed that it was usually easy to know when a venture was succeeding.

When a venture isn’t succeeding though, tough questions come up.  Do you invest more, work more or harder, change plans or markets or models?  Or do you simply give it up and move on?

Whether a business, a relationship, or any activity or commitment, how do you know when it’s time to change instead of just keeping at it?

Charlie’s trigger was time.  A very specific amount of time in a very specific context.  Both the element of time and the length he chose may seem arbitrary.  Perhaps in some businesses three years would be too short a time.

However, what is vitally important is that he set a limit.  It was his limit, his choice, and he did it in advance.

He was able to stick to it, too, “no matter what,” because it was a choice he was congruent about.

Last week I posted a story that I said was subtle in its use of NLP.

It’s one of those places where to gain understanding, you have to hold two opposing ideas and values in your head at the same time.

A popular saying in the world of NLP is that “to keep doing the same thing and expecting a different result is a definition of insanity.”

Quite a contrast to that popular wisdom “if at first you don’t succeed, try, try again.”  The values of persistence and commitment are hailed widely and loudly throughout our culture.  The value of knowing the difference between persistence and a failing course is not so widely hailed.

So how do you know the difference between doing the same thing and expecting a different result, and simply persisting – and hoping?

Like Charlie, the answer is in the triggers you set, or fail to set, for change.  In NLP these are an essential part of how we choose and create goals.  It’s what we call a well formed outcome.  The triggers for “do something different/change course” are based on criteria.

While there are many important criteria, time also has the quality of serving as a trigger for change.  This is really useful as long as you make it specific.

Saying “I want a raise soon or I’m going to change jobs” is too sloppy.

Saying “I want a raise in 90 days or less, by (month, date)” is much more likely to trigger you to action.

Have you set triggers for change, for new ways, in your life goals?

If you have, add them to the “comments” below and share what works for you!

If not, this is likely a very good time to do so.

Best regards,

Tom Dotz

PS:  the subject of outcomes is covered extensively in our “NLP Practitioner Training” both the residential program and the “NLP At Home” Living Encyclopedia.  Click here to read more.