The phrase “I don’t know” often signifies a mental block, leading to learned helplessness.
Instead, reframing the question to “How would you find out?” encourages active problem-solving and taps into existing resources.
This approach fosters autonomy and enables better strategic thinking in coaching, team settings, and personal self-coaching.
If you’ve ever watched someone do something brilliantly and thought, “How do they make it look so easy?” — you’re not alone. Whether it’s a leader who commands the room, a coach who inspires breakthroughs, or a parent who handles chaos with calm, there’s often a method behind their magic. In NLP, we call that method modeling. And it’s one of the most powerful tools for personal and professional transformation. What Is Modeling in NLP?
Rebuilding After the Fire: How NLP Helped Us Survive and Thrive On September 7, 2024, we lost everything. Our home, our belongings—everything we had ever owned except for what fit into a small bag. We escaped with our lives, our pets, three t-shirts, and a pair of jeans. In the days and weeks that followed, we faced one of the most difficult journeys imaginable. And without NLP, I truly believe we wouldn’t have bounced back
NLP Triggering and Anchoring – Firing Together Today the words and experience of triggering are all over the media. It’s almost always reported as a negative experience. There are calls to forbid certain behaviors because they ‘trigger’ some people. Triggering is just one part of a stimulus-response loop that was modeled in the early days of NLP and is called NLP anchoring. Anchoring and trigger descriptions in the media are entirely inadequate. They are like
Access and Anchoring to Three States – An Advanced NLP Exercise Here is a classic NLP Anchoring process exercise. Often overlooked and still as powerful as ever! While designed for groups of four, you can certainly do it with two, and even, perhaps, practice with yourself! Anchoring with NLP has already been introduced as the super glue that sticks experiences together in the previous day’s group exercise on future pacing. Examples: sleep postures. “Our song,” smell
Atomic Habits or Big Life-Affirming Goals? Why not both? A couple of different approaches have proven effective in achieving goals, and motivation is essential to all of them. One approach is the Tiny Little Habits approach, popularized in the “Atomic Habits” book. This method involves adding one little tiny habit at a time. Over time, you will achieve some pretty substantial differences in your life. The other way is to choose a significant goal
Negotiating and Resolving Conflicts, Internal and External: Framing, Reframing, and the Six-Step Process You’ve heard of “framing” in the context of politics, marketing, and areas where influencing people is a primary concern. In any context, the party setting the frame has preempted the permissible dialogue. For instance, in the area of politics, the Republican party has very successfully framed gun ownership as an issue of personal freedom. That consistently imposed framing has allowed them to
Avoiding collapsing businesses and getting a better job? Making better investments in love and life? The Power of Four – How Four little questions can change your world – or the world of someone around you. “According to whom?” “What would happen if you did/didn’t? How, exactly,…? Who, specifically…? One of the essential language sections in any good NLP training is called the MetaModel. It’s the first set of language patterns taught because understanding and
I wondered about that NLP Presupposition for a long time. Finally, I thought of one place where it is really useful. That place is behaviors you wish to simply stop, without replacing. Procrastinating is a very powerful way to stop those habits, behaviors, or addictions that you’re already really tired of. After all, isn’t the definition of procrastinating not doing? For instance, I drank alcohol pretty consistently for most of my adult life. Last year
The primary presupposition underlying all of Neuro-Linguistic Programming is that The Map is not the Territory. You experience life through a set of personal perceptual filters that are unique to you. Your experience is filtered first by the limits of your sensory organs and what you perceive as a small slice of the world. In this sense, you are out of touch with reality, because your every perception is ‘filtered’ not only by your biology